How to look tough in a scary movie

[(-_-)]

My friend just showed me this, I got a kick outa it.

Now everybody knows that horror movies are meant to be a test of one's mettle and "toughness,." With my pro tips you'll be sure to impress everybody in the theater with just how cool you are.

Tip 1.

Laugh. Laugh at everything and anything. Laugh during suspenseful door opening moments. Laugh during dialogue, no matter what's going on, laughing will prove to everybody that you're so tough, you're not scared of anything. You laugh in the face of cinematic danger. But most importantly, laugh during moments of absolute silence so that everybody knows it's you. Wouldn't want anybody to mistake some other bloke for you. YOU'RE the tough one after all!

Tip 2. Explain the movie to everybody. When watching a horror film, you can bet you're the only one who knows what's going on. Make sure to tell the poor people around you about basic plot devices, or that the bad guy is behind the door. Also, most people are illiterate and thus you should read out to them things such as signs and titles. Everybody will be impressed at how educated you are.

Tip 3. Be a comedian. Make sure to make witty remarks at every possible moment. you're a comedian and everybody should know it. Remember, the more juvenile your joke, the better. Don't forget the ignorance of the people around you, so you need to keep your jokes simple. During a romantic moment, make sure to yell, "take your top off!" That one's a killer.

Tip 4. Tell people what you would do. You need to make sure that people know you're not just fearless, smart, and funny, but also incredibly quick-witted. Yell out what you would do in certain horror situations, even if it involves running 25 yards across flat ground to go judo chop the shotgun out of a murder's hands. People need to know you would, and could do it! Also, don't forget, shooting guns is just like playing Halo. By the use of your super hand eye coordination, you're the world's best marksman. Even if you've never fired a gun before!!!

Tip 5. Defeat imitators. Other theater goers may also attempt these same tricks on you. This is a direct challenge to your masculinity and should be met with even more rigorous attempts to show off your machismo. Increased volume and frequency are both effective methods of winning "toughness battles."

I hope all of these great tips help you as much as they helped me! Heck, I'm the star of the show every time I go to horror movies now. People don't even watch the film they are so impressed by my amazing bravery in the face of certain death. So good luck to all you tough guys out there, and knock em dead!!!

[Dizzy]

Totally true.

They are also tips on how to get people to want to punch you in the face.

[mrs. cutiepie]

lol!

"even if it involves running 25 yards across flat ground to go judo chop the shotgun out of a murder's hands"

[(-_-)]

Originally Posted by Dizzy

Totally true.

They are also tips on how to get people to want to punch you in the face.

Haha, yeah, that's what I was telling my friend when he showed me this.

[MemphisMasenko]

I didn't really need these tips cause they are like common sense to me.
Good luck to the rest of you though cause...
Yeah I own these horror movies like that.
and you mad.